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You did it. You took that blind jump of faith and decided to have a first date. Unfortunately it seems to be going horribly wrong and everything you have read and seen in movies could not prepare you for how you feel at this moment. Trapped! What should you do?

Part of that depends upon you as an individual. If you are a very blunt person and feel comfortable doing so you could just be honest. Express to the other person that you are not enjoying yourself and the reasons why and ask that they forgive your sudden departure. Rarely is anyone comfortable with that approach though. For various reasons many of us would rather take the adventure of the more indirect approach even thought the indirect approaches tend to have mutable awkward outcomes.

In order for people to understand you clearly it is best to be direct about your intentions. One indirect approach sometimes utilized is lying. Trying to spare another’s feelings as you moan about not feeling well or having a previous appointment that you had completely forgotten about. It is not uncommon at all and really clichéd (and runs the risk of being recognized as an excuse). The bad aspect about lying is that it can have those unexpected follow up questions by the individual you lied to, and it encourages them to obliviously ask you on more dates to make up for the one that ended abruptly.

Another commonly used approach to end a bad date is to try and make oneself as undesirable as possible. If you are aware of what the other person finds undesirable in a mate, utilize or inflate those behaviours as a deterrent. It is quite possible that you might be able to get them to end the date prematurely if they find it intolerable. You can get them to end the date expediently for you. Be rude and obnoxious and watch the other person bail out on you. However be forewarned that if your date finds any of this behaviour attractive or funny, it could backfire on you and make them want you even more. Counter productive!

All comedy aside, the best way to end a bad date is to be as honest as possible about not having a good time while not being accusatory or blaming the other party. It’s best to put the emphasis on how you’re feeling and use clear non accusatory statements. By putting emphasis on your feelings you are not criticizing others an making them feel bad about themselves, while at the same time remaining clear about how you feel an where you stand so as to not create any confusion or false hope. The last thing you want to do is hurt someone’s feelings and dishonesty (even telling white lies to prevent hurt feelings) is wrong. But if you are a confident person and honest, you can indicate that you are interested in friendship (or perhaps not). Tell your date that you are simply “into him” or her and move on. There are plenty of fish in the sea.